It's not always fun living an independent life. Well, I've always equated freedom and independence with living alone by myself, in my room. No parents, no brother and sisters, not even Fluffy. Just me and my computer and everything else I decide to do. Whether it be I let my food rot in my ref, or I decide to do the laundry or perhaps, wax the floor, or cook! Or buy something from the grocery, or just like this... bumming in front of the computer the whole day, and choosing to do this over studying for my work project.
But I don't feel anything better at all, anything better than feeling there's no one bothering you, following your movements and saying there's something wrong with what you do, this and that. My sister just left and I'm alone again, unknowing if I'll spend the weekend productively or just let it pass and wait for another work week to cut through.
I'm sad, a little bit. And these are consequences of my wanting to be independent. Or maybe I'm being too hard on myself.
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See, every weekend, I basically choose from three major places to spend my weekend. If my sister comes up and decides to stay at my house, I stay and spend the weekend with her. Just like that. We're the typical home buddies. While raised differently, I in the province and them, near the city's suburbs, as long as there's computer (and Internet), you'll find it hard to convince us there's something more worthwhile to do than that. Actually, me spending the whole weekend with her is not really a choice. Can't really refuse if I become my sister's keeper. And it's fine since I've already been "cast away" for the whole week. I need someone here to share the Internet, the PSP, and Gossip Girl (yii!) with me. The only sad thing is, Fluffy is nowhere near.
And so when sister's not around and I'm categorically free, I spend the weekend at Fluffy's house. Thus, if first choice is weekend with sister, second choice is weekend with Fluffy. And the difference is I'm not here, and I think I watch a little too much TV when I'm there. Similarly, I can play DoTA, all the MMORPGs in his computer and the games in his consoles.
Lastly, the final choice is weekend at home. Since that day I packed my bags and left the house to stay at the camp 3 years ago, our house had become more like a vacation spot for me. I only decide to go home on special occasions (or not).
Same goes for everyone in the family who's experienced living in a place where there's Internet. When bro and sister lived in an apartment in Sampaloc last year, only Lola Aids resided in our house. I was still in the camp and no one goes home on weekends because... there's Internet in the apartment!
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Now it seems like the only thing keeping us away from home during weekends is a stable Internet connection. And sadly, not one ISP offers broadband services in our area. Not even PLDT, because of the rampant stealing of cables in our hilly village.
Mommy decided to avail of BayanTel's wireless dial-up service. Months after using it, the reception in our area wasn't going any better. There are 2 units of the wireless phone and I brought one in my house prior to applying for Smart Bro service. And those were the times I complain about super slow connection. I should be in a better place than the folks using Internet at home. But the 128kbps was reduced to 56kbps? Is there anything worse than that? And our dial-up from the earlier days was faster, I must say.
Mom should have asked about cash back offers for broadband subscriptions prior to applying for the service. She was instantly enticed by the PhP500 discount for availing 2 subscriptions at one time.
