Cureless

A change of life. A change of lifestyle. And lot more undetermined changes.

I feel less like the weeks prior to this. I tell you, I’ve undergone in those times one or two of the most stressful events in my life. I felt there were too many things moving away from me. My home, my friends, my job, and the life I lived for the last three years. No matter how nostalgic I wanted to remember the past, I got so warped in time that I can only recall my memories like a fast-paced music video. Honestly, I wanted to badly to write a blog entry on “things I’ll definitely miss in the military“. While slowly recuperating from that light-speed fast occurrence in my life, I could probably push this goal along the way. (Hey, it’s not too late!)

As I’ve implied/mentioned in the previous entries, I’m slowly adjusting to a new life. No, it’s not a breakup. (The! You wish!) I left the organization where I stayed for almost three years. The nostalgic melancholy brought by parting from something dear to me, which is almost like leaving high school, is coupled with an equally exciting longing for a new experience.

I’m not undermining my experience with the military. But since we were bounded by the garrison’s perimeter, I still think it wasn’t the “real” world. It was like an extreme Girl Scout camping experience. It was more that that I know but you know what I mean. I felt “sheltered”, my finances were controlled, I managed to save some amount. And ironically, though the organization deals with war, I felt safe.

I can look at my military experience at different angles. However, one fact remains unchanged, we’re still the pawns in a chess game. I guess no one could ever get that much sense of freedom when every place you go, there’s a battalion ready to order you around.

Now, the corporate world offers some perks I cannot get in a controlled setup like the military. They’ve got weekends and holidays, overtime pays and they’ve got no such thing as a 24/7 on-call duty. They also have clean toilets and free coffee. They may not allow slack-offs, naps and DoTA breaks, but at least I get to work what they pay me for.

Kidding aside, I have always wanted to be independent, to manage my expenses and save, to have my own space to beautify and tidy up, to cook whenever I like. And especially, to reclaim the weekends and recreate the stories in my dreams. Based on my assessment of the previous days that passed, I’m happy to say that I’m likely getting to that sense of “independence”. Or at least, these comforting thoughts back up the irrevocable decision I made. I felt this three years ago. And I won’t mind if I’ll feel something like this again three years from now.

Well anyway, I have Fluffy and my families to back me up. Thanks for saving me from near bankruptcy.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, August 22nd, 2007 at 9:54 pm and is filed under Memories, Personal. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.